It's been awhile since I've posted anything, so I figured I would do something more personal. I've been wanting to do another book review, but I can't seem to get far enough into my current book. Isn't that the worst? Nothing makes me more annoyed.
Since moving out of my mom's house this past April and being thrust directly into the belly of the beast that is adulthood, I've realized I have some wisdom to share. Just in case any of you guys needed some help straightening up the chaos of your lives. Because I'm so put together, HA. Alright, alright, let's get to the nitty gritty.
Now, this is something I've really had to work on. Merely a few years ago, I would not have considered myself a very compassionate person. However, it was getting laid off from my previous job that forced me to realize my life could use a little more sensitivity. At my previous job, I was laid off when I was just starting to feel really confident about my abilities in my position, so it was a real punch in the gut for me. When my bosses brought me in to do the deed, there were some tears, on both sides, and at the time I was only really able to see things from my own perspective. I was really devastated and freaked out about not having a job anymore.
It wasn't until I had a new job that I looked back on the meeting and realized something. I now feel more compassion towards my previous bosses because, let's face it, that's not something people enjoy doing. Also, the company as a whole was experiencing money issues, so it only got worse after I was gone, so it was a blessing in disguise, really. But there was a moment towards the end of the meeting where one of my bosses said, "I'm really so sorry, this is really unfair." And it was then that I thought, I feel for her. Not only did bringing some compassionate for others give me some peace of mind about the whole situation, it forced me to grow into a more sensitive human being.
I cannot stress this enough. There have been several times, in the career of being in my 20's, that I've based my self-worth on others. If he likes me, then I'll like me better, or if he doesn't text me back, then obviously I'm not good enough. This is a common thing that girls do, and it's just wrong. Yes, I completely understand that texting can be a frustrating, pulling-out-your-hair kind of ordeal, but it doesn't have to tear down your self-worth. When it comes to feeling confident in yourself, it's not something that comes easily, but it's definitely worth the wait. Fall in love with yourself, and don't let anyone tell you you're not good enough. Ever.
This is something I've learned much more recently. I'm referring to the dating world, boys and girls. Playing games is just a general annoyance of the dating world these days, and quite frankly, I'm not a fan. I never really have been. If you genuinely enjoy another person's company, i.e. their personality, humor, and yes even their looks, then SHOW THEM. It's all fun and dandy to text flirty things to each other, but what's the point when you could possibly have no clue where it's leading? If you know it's just something for fun, that's perfectly fine. At least you are aware of where you stand. There is absolutely nothing wrong with just having a good time until the right person shows up. Mr. Right Now could have a really sexy beard, or a hilariously convincing Sean Connery impression. If you know yourself well enough, and know you won't get too attached, then go for it. I can be a person that gets super attached to people, but I have to feel like it's genuine and goes both ways. So having fun is fine, until Mr. Right takes my hand and pulls me away from the rest of the crowd. That's my image of dating currently, could be wrong. Could be irrational. Who knows.
This one was tough for me. A few months back, I had a really bad argument with my parents over money, which is just the worst thing to have to talk about with your parents. I won't get into details, but the whole thing really forced me to realize that I still have some growing up to do in the financial category, i.e. getting my own separate bank account, and I needed to realize my parents aren't always going to have the answers. Lastly, I've very much learned that it's crucial to pick your battles. Some things are not worth getting upset over.
No, I don't have all the money in the world, but yes, it's okay to treat yourself every once in awhile. When the world feels like it's stabbing you in the back, it's perfectly acceptable to go to your favorite bookstore and buy a book, just for you. Or, buy that tote bag you've been eyeing online. It makes you feel a little better, and you can afford it, so go for it. Plus, there are plenty of other ways to treat yourself that don't involve money. Take a walk around your neighborhood, or go on a hike with your dog. Whenever I'm feeling a little down, I like to take my dog, Gussie, on field trips. He's a whiner, but he loves it, and so do I. It's knowing that you are capable of making yourself happy that counts.
Recently, I've come to realize who is really worth it in my life. Normally, I'm a very intense friend. I come off a little strong, but it's because I just enjoy being in people's lives. But, it has to be mutual. They need to enjoy being in mine, and that's the key element I've discovered lately. I've had some negative experiences where old, close friends have let me down and bailed on the friendship completely, and I tend to think it's something I've done. But, it's not. And that's a huge realization as well. It's not something I did, it's something they are dealing with. If they truly wanted to be in my life, they would be. It's as simple as that.
When you know who's worth sticking around for, it will be so easy to have a real, genuine friendship. By sticking around, I mean being there for 2am boyfriend drama texts, family issues, venting about work, planning a girl's night out when one of your friends is feeling down. I've always loved being there for other people, and it's definitely an emotional, and wonderful, feeling when they are there for you back.
Well, those are my nuggets of wisdom from my experiences as a 24 year old so far. I wonder what 25 will bring? I challenge Morgan & Gina to write a blog post telling what they have learned from being in their 20's so far. I know you haven't been in your 20's for very long Morgan, but still, it's a fun idea!
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